If anyone met us they'd surely agree
We're proper as any two people can be
We're clean cut well mannered
Well dressed and polite
But oh if they'd see us at night
When we're drinking and drugging and watching TV
Eating cold pizza and drinking ice tea
Just you and me and the devil makes three
Drinking and drugging and watching TV
So you bring the chemicals I bring the wine
I fiddle with yours and you diddle with mine
Then drunked and drugged we fall on our backs
Naturally performing unnatural acts
Such as drinking and drugging and watching TV
Eating cold pizza and drinking ice tea
Just you and me and the devil makes three
Drinking and drugging and watching TV
In the flicking TV light we're going to hell
Making love with the sound off to the PTL
Jim Baker can see what you're doing to me
Drinking and drugging and watching TV
So stop drinking stop drugging stop watching TV
Stop eating cold pizza and drinking ice tea
Stop living your life degenerately
Drinking and drugging and watching TV
Drinking and drugging and watching TV