Bobby Bare
"Whiplash Will" lyrics

Whiplash Will

Whiplash Will from Watsonville
He's got a rubber spine
It's just his luck
When he drives his truck
He keeps getting hit from behind

But Whiplash Will, he's hard to kill
And he's a real good sport
If you've got your checkbook handy
He'll settle out of court

He says, "Come on and hit me
Come on, come on, I dare you
Just rearend me
Bust me, bend me
Don't let this neck brace scare you"

Whiplash Will
At the bottom of the hill
He's got no taillights on
Sitting double parked
And waiting in the dark
For a Cadillac to come along

If you're driving a Rolls or an eighty-eight olds
He sure be glad you came
But if you're driving a Volks
He say, "Move on, folks
You're messing up my game"

"Come on and hit me
Come on, come on, I dare you
Just rearend me
Bust me, bend me
Don't let this neck brace scare you"

His twisted neck
Brings big old checks
His spine's been bought and sold
His vertebrae just pays and pays
His lumbar's made of gold

When Whiplash Will
Has got to pay his bills
He remembers what his daddy said
"Son, a poor boy's gotta
Break his back
If he's ever gonna get ahead"

Whiplash Will from Watsonville
He don't work alone
Got a doctor and a lawyer
And a tow truck driver
Waiting by the telephone

And he warns the rigs
About the highway pigs
Waiting to do him wrong
And they let Will know
On that CB radio
When a live one's coming along

"Come on and hit me
Come on, come on, I dare you
Yeah, just rearend me
Bust me, bend me
Don't let this neck brace scare you"

Oh, Whiplash Bill Will
Can't work it
But he owns that Mercedes

Authors: Fred Koller, Shel Silverstein