Roger Miller
"Vance" lyrics

Vance

He was born one morning
It was cold and it was snowing
And from the start he never had a chance
And though the doctors said he couldn't live
His mama had some faith to give
And they brought him to her
And his mama named him Vance

He was sick a long time then
I used to sit by him
I'd rub his head
He would squeeze my hand
But he never cried
He'd grit his teeth and smile at me
Cause he couldn't speak
And that's when I began to respect the little man
And I think Vance was three right about then

He started school and one day
He came home and at the doorway
I could tell the little man
Didn't want to come inside
He'd met a girl
But her boyfriend Smitty
Had caught him walking home with her
And nearly killed Vance
But then Vance never cried
And the only thing that Smitty hurt was pride

And he said, "Papa
Do you become a man
When you're twenty one"
And I said, "Age
Doesn't make a man a man
My son"
He looked at me so puzzled
With eyes so young and kind
I think Vance was seven about that time

I guess they say that first love
Is the very best
At least it was with Vance
Cause he'd scratched Becky on his desk
But Becky went with Smitty
And Vance was very small
And he used to dream
What it'd be like to be tall

Then a few years later
Vance came in one day
Told me and his mama
That he had to go away
To be fitted for a uniform
And though his mama shed a tear
He kissed her and said
He'd see us in two years

And he looked at me and said
"Papa
I'm gonna be a man"

Well, two years to the day
Vance came walking in the driveway
And I didn't recognize him from his size
Till he got near
He came in and he hugged his mama
And said, "Hey papa
Little man, wanna go with me
Somewhere and grab a beer"

So we're sitting at this table
When this fellow at the bar
Started bugging Vance
Calling him soldier
But Vance kept his cool
And he said, "Papa, that guy is Smitty
And he's to be pitied now
Cause that's the same guy
That used to bully me in school"

Then Smitty said the wrong thing
When he brought up Becky's name
And Vance finally stood and said
"Boy, what did you say?"
And it did my heart so much good
When Vance hit old Smitty
And it took two of Smitty's friends
To carry him away

Well, Vance left the very next morning
And it was cold and it was snowing
And from the first life hadn't been much fun
But he had finally made a stand
And he'd become a self made man
And incidentally
He'd just turned twenty one